Truth or Dare
by Leotron
Summary: When Penny gets dared to have sex with the amazingly asexual Sheldon Cooper, she doesn't think things could get much worse. But what happens when she finds out seducing him is going to be a bit harder than she had planned?
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One:**

Penny attracted anything that moved.

Well, almost anything.

Leonard didn't even bother to hide his attraction to her, and it couldn't be more obvious that Howard and Raj would sell each other out if it meant second base with everyone's favorite waitress. She knew all of this, and she didn't consider herself self-absorbed or even arrogant. It was just a fact of life.

People breathed, the sky was blue, and everyone was attracted to Penny in some way, shape, or form.

Everyone except for Sheldon Cooper, that is.

But who could really count him, considering the circumstances? As far as anyone knew, Sheldon wasn't attracted to _anything_ that way, and would rather sit in his spot and watch Firefly than ever think of touching another person intimately.

No one could ever imagine him doing anything close to sexual, and he himself seemed to think that it just wasn't possible. People breathed, the sky was blue, and Sheldon Cooper would remain a happy virgin for the rest of his life.

Or so everyone thought.

* * *

><p>It was almost midnight, and Penny found herself sitting in an apartment she had long since considered something close to her second home. All the boys were there. Leonard, Howard, Raj...<p>

Almost all the boys.

Sheldon had left nearly a half hour before, claiming he wasn't going to just sit around and play some pubescent sleepover game structured for sexually deprived teenagers. Instead he went back into his room, and they hadn't heard anything from him except a demand to control the noise volume.

What game were they playing, exactly? Only the one that could be suggested by the lone female of the group.

"Truth or dare." giggled Howard, his eyes focused on Leonard as he spoke.

Leonard seemed to take a moment to think, sizing up all that Howard could do to him and the consequences of them all. "Truth." he decided finally.

Almost immediately everyone groaned, glaring over at Leonard. "Really, that's what you picked?" Penny asked incredulously, and then began to taunt him. "Aw, little baby Leonard is scared of all the big boy dares. Boo hoo..."

Leonard rolled his eyes. "The one before me was a dare. I was trying to even them out."

A couple of disbelieving snorts and a "Shh..." from Howard later, he gave out his question. "On a scale of one to ten, how good was Penny in bed?"

This caused a light gasp from the person mentioned, and Raj leaning in slightly to hear the answer better.

Leonard took a moment to consider, all the while glancing at Penny every so often as he did so. "Well, if I _had _to say...a seven."

Almost instantly a couch pillow was thrown directly at his face, hitting its target and landing softly in his lap. Penny glared at him fiercely. "A seven? A _seven_? After I dealt with all your little Star Trek fantasies, you rate how good I was a seven?"

Leonard backpedaled. "Well, it's not that you weren't really good..." he started, putting up his hands in surrender. "It's just that a lot of times you didn't really want to do it but said you did anyways and you weren't as eager as I would have liked. So I counted those times and rounded it as a whole."

Penny stared at him for a few moments. "You are so unbelievable."

"No, what's unbelievable..." Raj interrupted from his seat on the couch. "Is how long it's taking to move on with the game. Penny, you're up next. Be brutal."

The blonde glared over at her ex, her mind going through a list of horrible things to dare him or ask. "Leonard, Truth or-"

"-Hey, Raj hasn't got a turn for a while now!" piped up Howard, pointing to his friend and interrupting her mid-sentence. "I think he should have a go."

Raj looked like he was going to agree, but from the deathly look Penny was giving him decided it would be better not to voice his opinion.

The room was filled with a tense silence, and Howard seemed to realize that he had stopped her from getting the payback she wanted to inflict on Leonard. "Or, you know, you could pick who you want." he added quietly, scrunching low into his seat.

"No, that's okay." Penny told him, her voice overly-sweet. She turned to face Raj. "Truth or dare, Raj."

"Dare." he picked quickly, seeming to figure picking that wouldn't piss her off as much and he wouldn't get verbally chastised by everyone else liked Leonard had.

Penny glanced over at Howard, took a moment to think about it, and then gave her requirement. "I dare you to get to second base with Bernadette."

This caused an uproar from Howard. "No! Hell no. Bernadette is, I mean was, _my _girlfriend."

Penny turned to look over at him. "Are you two still dating?" she asked simply.

"Well...no."

"Then there's nothing wrong with my dare." she pointed out, flashing a smile before glancing around the room. Leonard was doubled over laughing, Raj looked like a deer caught in headlights, and Howard was sulking in his chair.

"Aha...he has to...aha." Leonard went on, trying to control his fits of laughter but failing at the same time. "Oh Merlin, Penny, I think you've done the best one so far in the game."

"Wait, no!" Raj finally protested. "I can't do that! How will I do that? _Why_ would you dare me to do something like that?"

Penny crossed her legs and folded her arms across her chest. "Well, why not?" she asked, arching an eyebrow. Of course everyone in the room could see this was some twisted way to get back at Howard. After all, he had made it to where she couldn't get the payback that was rightfully hers for Leonard.

Truth be told, it was now starting to sink in now that she had dared Raj, considering she was kind of putting him in a bad place. But there was no way she was going to back down then. She was in a corner.

"Okay, here are the rules." she told him evenly, figuring it would be the best to elaborate. "It has to happen within two days. You have to get a boob touch, and she has to be fully aware of what you two are doing. Meaning, you can't trick her or force her."

"_Force _her?" asked Raj incredulously. "Why...How would I force her?"

"Please." Howard imputed. "She could squash you like a bug if you tried." He took a moment to smirk at his own little joke, but then seemed to realize that he was still mad at Penny. "I'll get you back for this." he promised to her. "I'll do it."

Penny giggled at him. "Yeah, I believe you." A moment later she regained her composure, re-crossing her legs. "Okay, then. I'll give you the opportunity. I pick dare. Hit me with your best shot."

Everything was quiet as Howard racked his brain for something to even begin to compare to her dare. Suddenly an idea snapped into his head, forming in his mind as if he had been thinking about it all along. It was horrible, it was sick, it was-

"I dare you to have sex with Sheldon!"

The room was full of a dead silence until Penny's ear-splitting scream broke into the air.

They all could hear a voice come through from the hallway a second later, muffled by the walls. "I must ask that you all keep it down. However am I supposed to concentrate on conquering Vaelastrasz with all of that racket going on out there?"

They sat there for a few long moments, no one saying anything, waiting to see if Sheldon was going to add anything else. When he didn't, Penny finally let out a shaky breath. "No...Sheldon? I'm not going to do that. Forget the stupid game."

Howard seemed shocked that he had actually been man enough to verbalize that dare in his mind, and it took him a bit to find his voice. "No, you have to. That's the dare. You dared Raj and this is my dare to you."

Leonard spoke up. "I'm afraid I have to agree with Penny. I mean, come on, this is Sheldon we're talking about. It's impossible."

Howard shot him a glare. "You just don't want your ex-girlfriend laying your roommate."

Raj grinned from where he was sitting. "Well, I guess this makes it all even then." he commented happily. "I get a boob touch and Penny has to shag Sheldon frakking Cooper!"

"No, I'm not." protested Penny. "I'm not doing it. I quit. Call me a killjoy, I don't care." There was no way in hell she would ever do anything like _that_ with Sheldon. It was just unfathomable.

Howard smirked smugly over at her. "But Penny." he began. "You have to. It's the rules."

She crossed her arms across her chest, arching an eyebrow over at him. "Oh really?" she asked. "And what if I don't?"

"Then I'll tell everyone what you did." he answered. "Don't you remember? New Year's Eve. Everyone was gone. I saw you Penny. And don't think I didn't because I have proof."

As he spoke, Penny could feel an uneasy sensation start to grow in her stomach, and she felt a bit queasy. "W-What?" she stuttered, a bad feeling coming from everything he was saying. He couldn't possibly know...could he?

"I have a video." he went on. "Many copies, in case you raid my house in order to destroy them all. Like you'd be able to find them, anyways." He gave a small laugh. "But as I said, if you don't do this I'll show everyone."

"Show us what?" Leonard asked, his face filled with confusion, Raj's looking similar. "What did she do?"

"Oh no." Howard told them. "I'll only share if she doesn't follow through."

"And how will you know if I do it?" Penny asked, swallowing. She suddenly didn't feel nearly as confident as she did only a couple of minutes before, back when she wasn't yet dared. "Besides, where did you get the video from?"

"Don't worry about that." he answered. "And I'll ask Sheldon if you did it, of course. We all know he couldn't lie to save his life. I give you two days, like you gave Raj, to go through with this, and your secret will be safe."

He seemed to be done, but then decided to add something. "And also, bring me back his underwear for good measure. We'll know if it's his because it'll be labeled with the day."

The next while was filled with repeated questions and protests. Leonard and Raj both wanted to know what Howard was currently holding over her head, if she was really going to do it, and the former also made a few futile attempts to put an end to it.

But it was too late. The dare was settled.

And when everyone, including her, finally went home, Penny found herself lying in bed in her bed, wide awake. She stared up at the ceiling, and wondered what the hell she had gotten herself into.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two:**

It took until morning for the shock to finally wear down and the first burst of realization to hit her.

She had to have sex with Sheldon. _Sheldon_. The tall, irritating physics nerd who didn't seem to have one sexual bone in his body. He didn't even like her all that much, and she had to get him to have sex with her.

It would have been easier if Howard would have just dared her to memorize all the words in the dictionary.

She didn't sleep at all that night, staying up and thinking about what actions she would have to commit sometime in the next two days. And she knew that she had to do it, or else Howard would show everyone what she had thought no one else knew except herself.

The realization finally hit her full force when she was making her morning coffee, hoping to keep her up during the day even though she didn't feel a bit of tired. She ended up dropping her cup, it slipping out of her hands and crashing to the floor, glass shattering all around.

And as she cleaned up the mess, she felt uneasy and suddenly decided to skip breakfast. How the hell was she supposed to get Sheldon Cooper to have sex with her? Would she have to _seduce _him?

At that thought she decided that she didn't really need to eat lunch either.

It wasn't that Sheldon was unattractive, it really wasn't. It was just because he was _Sheldon_. He had the potential to be sexually attractive, and she even thought of him as kind of cute, but more so in the way that kittens and puppies were cute. Not the I-want-to-have-sex-with-you cute.

His whole demeanor just wasn't anything close to sexual. He was happy to spend his days playing War of Warcraft and studying physics, which just made what she had to do a whole lot worse.

He wasn't interested in sex, let alone _her_. He found her irritating and unintelligent, and she was sure that any attempt to lay him would fail. But she would have to at least try in order to keep her dignity.

She was happy to go to work, even if she didn't feel particularly well. Being a waitress meant her days were always fast-paced and hectic, which gave her very little time to ponder on her dare. It was only until five o' clock rolled around and she was home did she finally have to acknowledge it again.

She took a shower, and momentarily stopped when she realized she was putting on a second coat of her body wash. Did Sheldon even _like_ strawberry? She was suddenly aware of the fact that they would be close enough to where he would be able to smell her.

And she would be able to smell him.

She felt dread wash over her. Chances were though he smelled nice, but still. That thought just made her internally freak out more.

She hadn't had anything to eat that day, and forced down an apple once her shower was done. She made sure to cover the dark circles under her eyes with make-up, even though she knew that it wasn't going to make a whole lot of difference.

She didn't know how the hell she was going to seduce him. Should she rent a Princess Leia costume and just wait for him in his room? But how would she get there without him noticing? He never left the apartment.

But she realized it was a stupid idea in the first place, and decided to just be straight forward.

So, swallowing down any pride she had left, she forced herself to try and think of a way to get through what was to come as she left her apartment.

* * *

><p>It took Sheldon a few seconds to finally answer the door after she had knocked.<p>

"Oh. Penny." he said when he opened the door to let her in. "Your knocking sounded kind of frantic and for a moment there I though Leonard had forgotten his keys again. Is anything troubling you? Would you like a hot drink?"

Of course Leonard would be out of the house, she realized. He probably knew what was going to go down that night.

"Uh...no." she answered after a long moment. "I'm fine."

She looked at him, her fingers twitching slightly. He was wearing his blue bathrobe and pajama bottoms, his hair slightly damp. "Did you shower?" she asked him.

"Why yes." he replied. "I find that warm water relaxes my body and helps me keep my focus right before I begin a paper. Leonard went out to go see a show so I can remain completely undisturbed. Except for you're unexpected visit, of course. Which leads me to my next question. Why are you here?"

Penny opened her mouth, but then closed it shut. She hadn't really thought of a decent explanation on the way there, and still wasn't sure on what to do. Now that the scene was unfolding, she had to do her best to keep her hands from shaking.

"Well, uh...I uh..." she stared, searching her mind for something. _Anything_. "My computer is acting up again. I was wondering if you could...you know, take a look at it for me."

Sheldon rolled his eyes. "Now Penny, I already told you what to do if your internet won't load. All you have to-"

"-It's not that." she interrupted. "It's something else. Please come check?" she asked quietly.

"But Penny, I find that horribly rude of you. As you can see I'm very busy." he said, waving his arms and motioning over to the table on which his laptop sat. "I have very important work to attend to."

"Please?" she repeated, as if that would help. "It's probably nothing complicated. I just...want to make sure."

It took a long few moments, her silently praying he would give in so she could get everything over with. She wasn't sure what she would do once she got him alone in her apartment, but decided to work as she went along.

"Oh, all right." he agreed, and she let out the breath of air she had been holding. "I'll go try to find and eliminate whatever problem you need help with. It's probably as simple as you deleted your internet icon or downloaded too many add-ons."

"Thank you, Sheldon." she told him, slightly relieved but more so fearful of what lay ahead. "This really means a lot to me."

"Hmph." he gave a kind of half-snort, and they walked in silence out of the apartment and across the hall, over to hers. On the way there she could feel the uneasiness more prominently with each and every step she took, and she didn't think it could get any worse until his next question.

"Now where is this computer of yours?" he asked when they were finally in her living room. She watched as he glanced around, turning every which way in order to find it. "My, I don't see it anywhere."

"It's in my room." she answered after a moment, forcing herself to keep her voice as level and normal as possible.

"Well then, I find it also rather rude that you couldn't just bring it out here so my visit could be as timely as possible." he informed her, though he began to go in the direction of her room. "But very well, I will perform my diagnosis and treatment from there."

She reluctantly followed along after him, gritting her teeth slightly to keep herself calm so she wouldn't run out of the apartment and never look back. _You have to do it, Penny..._

Although she kept repeating this to herself, it wasn't helping her very much.

So when Sheldon was standing right next to her bed, looking down at the laptop placed in the middle of it, she closed her eyes and pushed him.

"Penny!" he exclaimed as he fell onto the bed, flailing his arms to catch himself. "Oh my."

The initial plan was for her to immediately jump on top of him once he hit the covers, but she found herself frozen in place. _Come on, just do it...he's caught off guard...now is your chance...you can do it..._

Although this all went through her mind, she couldn't move and could barely just manage to think. She _couldn't_ do it. Not with him. No, no, no.

As it turned out, her small window of opportunity had gone as quickly as it had come. When she had pushed him she was going to just try and kiss him until he didn't resist, but now that option was gone.

He was sitting on the bed, brushing himself off. "Penny?" he said, looking up at her. "Penny? I come here to help you and then you decide to assault me with your calloused hands."

Penny willed herself not to blush, feeling a sudden burst of relief that she didn't have to go through with it. At least, not for that night. Theoretically she could attempt it again, but she didn't really feel up to it.

"I'm sorry, Sheldon." she told him apologetically. "It was an accident."

Sheldon stayed for about ten more minutes, but under the complete rule that she not attack him again. Penny had to make up a reason as to why her computer wasn't working, considering she had never planned to get that far into her excuse.

She had eventually settled on her internet page not loading correctly, and of course when Sheldon tried to open IE it worked perfectly. "How odd." she observed, attempting to act surprised. "Well, I guess it's back to normal then. Goodbye."

She tried to hurry him out of her apartment, figuring she'd feel better when he was gone. But he spoke while she was leading him out. "Did you close an internet page unexpectedly? I told you about that. Perhaps it asked if you would like to go back to the page you were on and you said yes, so it locked up your computer..."

He didn't get to finish when she said another quick goodbye and slammed the door in his face.

She knew it was rather rude, and could hear a faint "Oh dear" as Sheldon left.

Relief washed over her, and for a long while she closed her eyes and just leaned against the closed door, slowly sliding down into a sitting position. The good feelings and relaxing moment didn't last for long though when she realized that she now only had one more day to finish her dare.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three:**

The next morning was filled with the same dread as the previous one, although not nearly as much.

But she still had one more thing to add on to her weariness for that day. It was her last chance to actually seduce Sheldon. She would have to do it sometime in the next few hours, or else she would have unsuccessfully done the dare and everyone would know about her secret.

She got out of bed, going through the same routine as the day before but her mind feeling even more clouded with thoughts. Even that day at work couldn't seem to distract her well enough, and she found herself thinking about it.

Her thoughts just always led back to her dare, and it didn't take long for mental images to start to flash through her mind. At first they were subtle, just her trying to seduce him. But they progressively got more and more explicit, finally the actual acts beginning to go through her head.

This left her extremely uneasy and on edge, causing her to have trouble doing her job properly. Of course this meant she got rather mediocre tips, except for when the whole gang came in for lunch.

She nearly had a panic attack when she saw that Sheldon was there, even though she knew he was going to be. Leonard, Howard, and Raj all glanced over at her as they took their usual orders, but she knew they could tell nothing had happened by the looks on their faces.

After all, Sheldon appeared to be completely normal, while she looked like she was stressed out.

When she finally brought them their food, she avoided placing Sheldon's in front of him until the last minute. "Why Penny." he started, and she winced at the sound of his voice. "You didn't put any ice cubes into my lemonade."

"I didn't?" she asked, sparing a momentary glance down at his drink. Sure enough, he was correct. "Sheldon, it's cold, I promise you. It came out of the machine."

"But how will it remain to keep the perfect temperature as I enjoy my meal?" he questioned, looking up at her from where she stood.

Penny rolled her eyes at him. "Sheldon, it's fine. Just drink it without ice, okay? I just forgot it."

"Please go get me a few cubes for my drink, please." he told her, unrolling his napkin and placing it in his lap. "You know, you seem to be suffering from many lapses of memory lately. You couldn't even remember me explaining to you how to work the internet, and actually had the audacity to bother me last night about it."

Penny glanced over and saw everyone at the table, except Sheldon of course, either choke into their drinks or napkins, all trying to stifle a laugh.

"Well, I'm sorry, Sheldon. I'll get you some ice right away." she finally agreed, giving up. She didn't want the conversation to continue anymore. She was going to do the dare, but that didn't mean they got to know the details on how she did it.

Eventually they finished their meal and left, leaving her to feel a bit of tension finally light up on her. The rest of the work day remained uneventful, and for the second time in a row she dreaded for it to finish. She didn't want to go home and have to deal with what laid ahead.

When she finally did get home, she still had no idea on as to how she would be able to seduce him. For a moment she just considered getting him really drunk, but she didn't think he'd willingly drink alcohol, especially with her in the room. He only did it on rare occasions.

And also, she still wasn't sure if he would even be able to get it up, so having him drunk would probably reduce the chances of this.

In the end she decided to take the less logical route again and make it up as she went along. So when the clock said it was seven o' clock, she knew it would be a good time to go over there. After all, Sheldon went to sleep at nine, and she didn't want to keep him up even if they were going to...

She tried not to think about it.

But as she traveled across the hall and back over to his apartment, she couldn't control the thoughts running throughout her head.

_Sheldon. Sheldon naked. Sheldon and me naked. Sex. Lots of sex. He's a virgin. No sex drive whatsoever. Sheldon naked. Sheldon naked on top of me. Sheldon and me naked. Sheldon._

This just proved to make her even more nervous, and she gulped. Truth be told, she would most likely try to top because he was probably the most inexperienced man she had ever met and she would have to lead...

She had ended up reaching his apartment and grabbed onto the door, forcing herself not to gag and turn around.

_I must do this. No turning back now._

Again, she knocked on the door. It took a few moments, but Sheldon finally answered. He wasn't in a robe this time, instead wearing one of his usual get-ups. That day's shirt happened to be the Green Lantern.

He rolled his eyes when he caught site of her, sighing dramatically. "Please tell me this visit is not another one of your attempts to disregard your ignorance. Although the fact that you're attempting to become more educated in basic computer working is promising, I haven't the time to play your little learning game."

Penny swallowed, inviting herself in by walking past him and into the living room. "No, no..." she assured him quickly. "I was just wondering if I could borrow one of your comic books."

She knew it was a lame excuse, but chances were he wouldn't have the social skills to recognize it.

Sheldon peered at her for a few moments, narrowing his eyes skeptically. "I suppose." he began. "But I had no idea you would ever be interested in any form of graphic novels."

"I'm not." Penny told him, but quickly backpedaled. "I mean, I _am_, it's just that I wasn't before. A girl at work seemed to like them and, you know, I decided to give them a shot."

He allowed a little "Hmph" but didn't question further. "Very well. Follow me and pick out suitable reading material."

And she trailed along after him as he went toward his room, listening to him continue to speak. "I will lend you exactly _one_ comic book, no more than that, for one week. Seven days, and I expect you to have it returned in tippy top shape. Understand?" Before she could realize it, he turned around as in order to face her.

Penny found herself standing only a few inches away from him. "Uh...yeah, sure." she agreed, gulping.

A moment later he moved back around and entered his room, and she glanced around, bracing herself for what she would have to do in what was surely a short amount of time.

Sheldon walked over to his comic book shelf, and she reluctantly followed him over, and watched as he began to rift through the rows. "Now, which one would you like?" he asked, once again turning to look at her.

Penny took one deep, preparing breath. And before she knew it, she was doing the thing she couldn't quite manage the previous night. "This one." she answered, and before he could react she had pushed against his shoulders, forcing him into powerful kiss.

It surprised her as to how quickly he could react. In less than a second he had managed to pull away, abruptly turning, causing his legs to hit the side of his bed and him to topple onto the covers.

Penny didn't have any time to register what had happened before her instincts took over. She jumped on top of him, but before she knew what she was doing he had rolled out from under her and stumbled away, running into the wall.

"Penny!" he finally yelled when he impacted, beginning to run around the room frantically, as if trying to get away from her but not knowing which way to go. "How _dare _you try to commit such primal acts with me? What do you consider me to be? Some wild animal?"

As if to emphasize his point, he grabbed the nearest bottle of hand sanitizer and began to scrub it furiously all over his face, finishing it all off with a baby wipe.

"Oh dear, oh dear, oh dear." he repeated as he continued to move around deliriously. "I'm infected. All the germs you probably carry are certainly on me. I doubt you use the extra protection lip balm I recommended. Oh God, I feel sick."

Penny didn't know what to do. She had failed. She felt silly to ever believe that there could be any way for her to ever actually seduce Sheldon Cooper. It just wasn't possible. She didn't have any idea on what to try next.

Maybe she should just come clean. But what would he do when she told him?

"Sheldon." she said, but he didn't appear to have heard. "Calm down, Sheldon."

"_Calm down_?" he repeated incredulously, finally stopping to look at her. "You just attempted to commit coitus with me! How am I supposed to calm down? I am not attracted to you, Penny. I find you incredibly irritating and your ignorance inflames my nerves at times."

Penny decided to ignore his rudeness, even if it stung. "Sheldon, I'm pretty sure you aren't attracted to anything."

"Yeah, well, anything didn't just try to strip me of my purity!" he retorted, still shuffling around. He got a new baby wipe and rubbed it through his hands. "Penny, you better leave. Heaven forbid Leonard finds out about your adultery."

"Sheldon, we're not dating anymore, remember?" she told him patiently. "And he already knows."

"I'm sorry. I find it hard to keep up with all your constant make-ups and break-ups." he said. "And what do you mean he already knows? Is he out in the hall?" He walked over to the door and peered behind it. "I don't see anyone currently spying on this disgraceful scene."

"No, Sheldon." she said, closing her eyes and wincing at what she knew she was going to have to admit. "You better sit down."

He glanced down at her position on the bed. "Well I'm certainly not going to sit next to you. Further assaults on my being might be triggered. I'll stand, thank you."

She rolled her eyes. "Fine. Just listen, then."

She hadn't ever planned on telling him the truth. The original idea was to just seduce him and in the morning agree to never talk about it again, but by that point she knew there was no way for that to happen.

And she reluctantly began to describe the game of truth or dare, purposefully going slow as if to put off what she dreaded on telling him. Occasionally he would interrupt, asking why on earth someone would dare another to do such a trivial thing.

Finally, though, she got to Raj's dare, to which Sheldon chuckled. "Oh, I don't think he'll follow through. Bernadette isn't that desperate of a woman."

When she told him on how Howard got mad, she hesitated for a moment, but then shut her eyes again and just let it out. "And he dared me to have sex with you within two days."

Sheldon's eyes widened. "Is that what you all do when I'm out of the room? Create low dares in which the party in question has to commit sexual acts with another in order to humor the rest?"

Penny mentally groaned. "It's truth or dare, Sheldon. It's supposed to be childish."

"Well heaven, aren't I glad I missed the game in order to level up my character." he paused, but then continued. "Just don't do it. Or tell him you did commit coitus with me without having to actually practice the act."

"I'm afraid it's not as simple as that." she told him. "Howard...he has a video about me, and it's rather humiliating, and if I don't do it he'll show everyone else. He'll also ask you if you did it or not, and face it, Sheldon, you're a horrible liar."

"And it's apparent that you're stupid enough to get yourself blackmailed." he retorted, folding his arms across his chest. "But just to let you know, I have no intention to commit coitus with you in any way, shape, or form, regardless of your situation."

Penny felt close to begging. She stood up and faced him, hoping to look more confident than she actually was. "Please, Sheldon." she pleaded. "You don't know how much it would hurt me if this video got out."

"Well surely it can't be that significantly bad." he told her certainly. "I'm sure it's just simple and trivial, and you're over-reacting. It's a bad habit of yours, you know."

Penny swallowed, shifting uncomfortably. "You have no idea what's in that video."

"Enlighten me, then."

Penny had no desire to describe it to him, but considered it was only fair for him to know seeing the circumstances. So slowly she began to tell him everything, gritting her teeth at parts. When she was done, Sheldon blinked.

"That's not as nearly as bad you painted it out to be, Penny." he finally told her, doing that little laugh of his. "Plenty of people-"

"-No!" she interrupted him. "I mean, I know. I _know_. But I don't want anyone else to."

"Then it's your fault and misfortune for being placed into that inconvenient situation." he replied evenly. "And now you wish to ask a huge favor from me that I do not wish to carry out."

"Please." she begged, feeling her voice slowly start to get quieter. "Please, just this once. Do it for me. I promise I'll never ask for anything from you again, and I'll owe you one and will do anything you want."

Sheldon raised his eyebrows. "_Anything_ I want?" he inquired curiously.

Penny had a strong feeling that she was going to regret that statement. "Anything."

"Well, when I was in your bathroom when you clumsily dislocated your shoulder, I did see an assortment of attractive bath and hair products. I was curious as to how they would work."

"_That's_ what you want?" Penny asked him incredulously, not understanding why he would pick something so simple.

"Yes." he answered. "When you so rudely forcing yourself on top of my unwilling body, I noticed that you smelled like strawberries. I've found myself incredibly fond of the scent ever since I was just a small child."

Penny couldn't believe on how easy this was proving. "And if I just give you these, you'll be willing to sleep with me?"

"Well, no." he told her, and Penny's relief was diminished. "I would also appreciate to use you as my next test subject when I need to practice my latest experiments on a human being. It is rather hard to find someone willing, though I can't fathom why."

Penny looked at him questioningly. "Will any of this be dangerous?"

"Not at all." he replied easily. "I wish to use you again. Taking your life or seriously damaging you in the process of an experiment would defeat this purpose."

Penny decided it would be best not to comment on that. "So...that's it?"

Sheldon slowly started to nod. "I suppose."

"What now, then?" she asked, suddenly aware of the fact that they were standing on opposite sides of the room. He was closest to the door, while she stood next to the window. The situation seemed to become even more embarrassing, although he didn't appear to notice.

"Logic would impose that you attempt to commit the failed acts from before again except that this time I refrain from resisting." he answered rationally. "Now I will prepare things for this incredibly unnecessary process while I assume you undress."

He placed all his bottles of hand sanitizer and boxes of baby wipes onto the night stand next to his bed. He also moved the tissues to an appropriate place, and once again cleansed his hands.

Penny stared at him for a moment, but then awkwardly began to remove her shirt.

Sheldon glanced over at her. "What are you doing?" he asked.

She stopped abruptly. "Removing my clothes...? Like you asked...?"

He straightened up. "Unless the rules of the sexual acts of life have changed since I took Sex Ed, a rather pointless class indeed, I permit that it isn't necessary for all of our clothes to be shed during this experience. I assumed you would want to keep some articles on."

Penny got a tad bit defensive. "Why is that?"

"I thought you would be insecure to have coitus with a man who you have no interest in whatsoever, with the lights on. But perhaps I was wrong."

"Why do the lights need to be on?" she asked, confused.

"Having them off would be rather irrational, considering it would make it more difficult to commit the workings of sexual intercourse."

Penny opened her mouth to question what he just said, but then decided not to bother and closed it again. "Are you insecure, Sheldon?" She didn't really know why she had bothered to ask that, but her curiosity seemed to get the best of her.

"Not particularly." he answered, his voice straightforward. "Though I do find the idea of someone touching me in a sexual form, and vice versa, rather repulsing and would rather not have to experience it."

Penny felt herself actually starting to get insecure about what lay ahead. "Do you find..._me_ repulsing?" she asked him quietly.

"Not at all." he told her. "Although I am not attracted to you, I can tell from your physical characteristics that you are a healthy female, above average in looks, and if humanity went by the rules of the animal kingdom, you would be a dominate female."

She didn't quite know how to respond to that. "Thank you..."

"You are very welcome." he replied. "Now let's get down to business. Remove your pants and preferably your undergarments and I shall do the same."

Penny suddenly remembered something, the other part of the rules with the dare. "Oh yeah, Sheldon, I forgot to mention something."

He didn't bother to look up at her as he began to undress. "Yes?"

"I'm going to need your underwear."


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four:**

If Penny were being honest with herself, she would actually admit that it really wasn't _that_ bad.

Truth be told, even though she would never admit it to anyone, it was actually kind of _fun_.

Sure, she found it irritating at times when Sheldon would ask why it was necessary to touch his body in a certain place, and when she suggested a new position he started on a speech on how that would be illogical and would surely make the goal they were trying to reach more difficult.

But it was almost as if she was teaching him how to work the computer, which would never need to happen, or how to drive. His inexperience actually made the situation more lightweight, though when he tried to sanitize his hands in the middle of it she couldn't help but get a little irritated.

She actually managed to get him naked, convincing him that it wouldn't take as long if they both weren't wearing any clothes. He finally agreed, but only on the condition that he could keep his socks on because it was cold.

When it was finally over, she begrudgingly went and got him a glass of warm milk to help him to fall asleep. It was only until a while after that did she finally manage to shut her eyes and drift into sleep.

* * *

><p>"Penny."<p>

Someone was saying her name.

"Penny."

She shifted in her sleep, hoping to block out the sound.

"Penny."

She buried her face in the pillow, swatting slightly with her hand in the direction of the noise.

"Penny, please do not assault me. I find the fact that you are ignoring me extremely rude."

She finally opened her eyes, staring at a blurry person sitting on the edge of the bed. A few blinks later she could make out Sheldon, who was wearing his pajamas with a robe pulled over them.

"Penny, I expected you to make your exit after I fell asleep. First you use my bed as a way to carry out your childish dare, and now you have the indecency to sleep on it without my permission. How did Leonard ever deal with your inexplicable disregard?"

Images of what she had done flashed through her mind, and Penny was shocked to realize that she didn't really regret it all that much. "Sheldon, what time is it?" she finally asked, ignoring his question.

"Seven o' clock." he answered, glancing down at his watch. "Well, actually it's six fifty nine and ten seconds. Now eleven seconds. Now twelve."

"Sheldon, shut up."

"Thirteen."

"Please, it's too early for this."

"Fourteen."

"What time did you get up, Sheldon?" she asked quickly, hoping to distract him.

Sheldon had opened his mouth for the next second, but shut it for a moment when she spoke. "Thirty minutes ago. I have already had a shower and I made myself some hot chocolate."

"How did you sleep?"

"Expectedly." he answered. "The physical acts we executed last night managed to make my body more tired than usual, and I slept rather efficiently to regain the energy lost from the whole experience."

Penny tried to fight the blush from coming to her cheeks, but she could already feel the warmness against her face. "Yeah, speaking of which, I better get going. I'll be late for work if I don't hurry."

"I assume that now that it is morning you find the whole encounter from before awkward, but I am afraid I cannot spare you the embarrassment by informing you that it is, in fact, Saturday." he said when she stood up. "And also that you are currently naked."

She had forgotten that she had never actually gotten dressed, and for a moment she just stood there like a deer caught in headlights. Finally, though, she grabbed a blanket from his bed, which proved a bad idea when she remembered how tightly he tucked his sheets into the sides.

In the end she just grabbed her clothes from the ground and threw them back on, blushing even more furiously.

"I can assure that you being nude in my presence is not that big of a concern, considering I got a tad bit more familiar with your body last night than I had ever intended or wanted to. If you wish to leave, please excuse yourself soon. I was planning to work on my project this morning."

"You'll be okay if I just leave?" she asked as she began to pull on her shirt.

"Prefer it, actually." Sheldon answered, a moment later standing up and walking out into the hall. She followed him into the living room, which was empty. "You can make a hasty escape, but I must warn you that your window of time is narrow. Leonard's scheduled to wake up at any time now."

Penny panicked, immediately glancing over at the hall. "Why didn't you tell me?" she asked him, but didn't wait for a response. She ran back into his room and gathered the rest of her clothes, and one article of his, and then ran back out.

She was hurrying along past him when he spoke. "Penny, it occurred to me this morning as I was lathering my hair in the shower that I don't recall using any form of protection." he informed her. "I thereby assume you use a type of birth control, correct?"

For a moment Penny felt every part of her freeze, but then she relaxed. "Yeah, of course. I'm on the pill."

"Ah, much gratitude." he said. "I'm afraid it isn't quite time for me to reproduce a gift for humanity."

Penny smiled, walking over to where he stood. "Bye, Sheldon." she told him, taking a moment to stop in front of him and placing a kiss on his cheek. "Thanks for doing all this for me."

"You are not very welcome." he replied irritably, pulling out a small box of baby wipes from his pocket and proceeding to wipe his face. "Germs are currently multiplying on my face because of you."

Penny smiled. "Then imagine what's happening _down there_, Sheldon."

"That was a very inappropriate suggestion." he told her, scowling as he pointed to the door. "Now make your leave."

"Sure thing."

* * *

><p>"So did you do him?"<p>

It was close to midnight, and Penny found herself once again sitting in the living room to Sheldon's and Leonard's apartment, surrounded by everyone except the man in question.

She rolled her eyes, glaring over at Raj. "Did you get to second base with Bernadette?" she asked him, knowing the question would make him uncomfortable.

Raj immediately tensed up, shutting his mouth.

This earned him a nudge from Leonard. "Come on, she'll never answer your question if you don't answer hers." He looked over at her. "So did you do it?"

Penny threw a pillow over at his face, similar to when she did it only two nights before. It felt odd, knowing that there was only a two day time span from when she was dared and until then.

Thankfully, she didn't have to answer the question. At least, not just yet.

"It went horribly." Raj informed them miserably before she could open her mouth. "I did the dare, though. You can ask her, I'm sure she'll be ranting about it for years to come."

"Come on, Raj, it couldn't have gone that bad." reassured Howard, but he had a look of pure delight on his face at the thought of Raj screwing up in that particular dare. "What happened?"

Raj seemed to take the easier route and ignore his friend's obvious glee. "I managed to get her in my room, and I started kissing her and it was awesome, and surprisingly she didn't protest when I tried to take off her shirt."

He paused, wincing slightly. "But as I was attempting to do it, I ended up getting so nervous that I somehow managed to get tangled into her shirt, and eventually I couldn't take it anymore and came clean to her. She proceeded to slap me, curse at me, and storm out of the room."

Howard had already doubled over laughing, unable to control it. "She...You...You told her! Haha."

"I hope you didn't tell her I was the one who dared you." Penny interjected, not wanting Bernadette to be angry with her.

"No." replied Raj. "I said Howard did."

Howard finally stopped laughing. "You _what_?"

"She asked me who dared me and I just froze up." he explained. "I decided she already didn't like you very much so it really wouldn't hurt to discriminate you further. And soon the lie was working so well it was as if it was the truth!"

"Why...Why would you...I was planning to get back together with her!" Howard yelled at him furiously. "I'm going to tell her you were lying."

"No, don't!" Penny pleaded, beginning to panic.

Howard opened his mouth to give a retort, but Leonard spoke before he could. "Fine, then. You want to change the subject?" he asked her. "Tell us, Penny, did you complete _your_ dare?"

"Go ahead and tell Bernadette it was me."

"No, we've moved on." he urged, and the room went silent as everyone stared curiously at her.

"Um, I...sort of..."

Leonard relaxed back into his chair, looking relieved. "You didn't do it, did you?"

Penny didn't know why she was putting it off. She didn't care what they thought. She didn't care or deserve their mocking, and neither did Sheldon. She was better than that, and so was he. She wasn't going to be ashamed.

"Well, actually I did."

The whole room seemed to go to a dead quiet.

Nobody moved and nobody spoke. For a long, drawn out moment there, it seemed as if everyone just took the time to stare at Penny. Leonard's chin had dropped, and Raj and Howard looked as if they were unable to say anything.

The silence was finally broken by the sound of whistling coming from the hall. A moment later Sheldon walked through the front door and to his room, carrying a laundry basket, which seemed to be filled with his sheets.

Raj gaped at her. "You really did do _him_, didn't you?"

Penny felt her cheeks start to get warmer once again. "That's what I said, isn't it?" she asked, forcing herself not to feel any embarrassment.

Leonard looked as if he was having trouble breathing. His lungs seemed to have just stopped knowing how to work, and he was taking in short little breaths.

Howard, on the other hand, regained his composer and stared at her. "Really? Then prove it." he demanded, trying to look unimpressed.

Penny rolled her eyes, reaching into her purse and pulling out Sheldon's "Friday" underwear. She tossed it over at him, and he proceeded to flinch back. "See? That proof enough for you?"

"You could have just snuck into his room today and taken it when he wasn't there." tried Howard, unconvinced. It was hard to blame him, considering how likely it was that Sheldon could ever actually getting laid, let alone by her.

Penny folded her arms across her chest and crossed her legs. "Sheldon? Can you come in here for a minute?" she called pointedly. She looked over at Howard. "You said he couldn't lie. Ask him."

A moment later Sheldon had entered the room, which caused all eyes to stare over at him, Leonard's breathing still faltering every now and again.

"Now Penny, I believe the correct question would be, '_May_ you come in here for a minute'." he informed her as he walked over to where they were all sitting. "Now whatever do you want?"

Penny looked expectedly over at Howard, who awkwardly turned to stare at Sheldon. "Um, is it true that you and Penny did the hanky panky last night?"

Sheldon looked from Howard to Penny, his eyes narrowed in confusion. "The hanky panky? I am unaware what that slang term refers to, but I am sure we did not explore into that last night. We did, however, commit coitus, if that's what you're asking."

Raj, who had been taking a sip of his Fanta at that precise moment, ended up spitting it out and choking.

Leonard finally found his voice. "You _what_?"

"We practiced in the acts of sexual intercourse." answered Sheldon simply. "And although my body did find it a rather pleasing experience, I have no desire to achieve in ever doing it again."

"You better not!" Leonard told him, his voice slightly raised. He turned to Penny. "You actually...why would you..."

"You appear to be irate due to the recent mutual intimacy committed by Penny and I." Sheldon observed before she could speak. "And I can assure you that it was no wanting of hers. From what I gathered from her story, she appeared to only have agreed to do it because of blackmail targeted at her."

Raj perked up a bit. "You know, I still kind of want to know what was in that video."

"Well, you can't." Penny told him sharply. "I did my side of the deal, and Howard can't show any of you."

Sheldon looked over. "I found the material of the blackmail to be very trivial and rather disappointing as substance." he said to no one in particular. "As I told her, plenty of people-"

"-Don't you dare!" she interrupted him before he could finish. This proved to be pointless though, considering what came next.

"Penny had sex with a girl!"

Once again the whole room fell silent when Howard made his outburst. Sheldon took the time to finish his sentence.

"-decide to experiment with the same sex. It is quite common. Did you know homosexuality is found in approximately four hundred and fifty species? It makes Penny's one night stand seem rather meaningless, don't you think?"

Penny buried her face into her hands. "How _dare_ you, Howard!" she screamed at him, her voice muffled slightly from her hands in the way. "You said my secret would be safe if I went through with my dare!"

Howard looked shocked, staring at them all with wide-eyes. This was nothing compared to the expression on Leonard's face though, and Raj looked beside himself with awe as he stared at Penny.

"I-I'm sorry!" apologized Howard. "Sheldon was just going on and I couldn't help myself!"

"Wait, wait." Leonard said, holding his hands up to stop the conversation. "What do you mean she had sex with a girl?"

"I believe he was making the implication that Penny and another female like herself had sexual intercourse." explained Sheldon. "I personally thought that was blatantly obvious."

"No, no!" Penny started, flustered. "I mean yes, but...just hear me out."

Raj smiled at her from his seat on the couch. "Go on and tell us everything about how it happened. Don't leave out the important details."

Penny shot him a glare. "I was drunk, it was New Years, and I don't know, she was kind of _hot_."

"It's perfectly natural to have a curiosity." commented Sheldon. "Mixed in with the consumption of alcohol and the high adrenaline rush from an exciting event, such as a new year, a person can find themselves doing things normally outside their comfort zone. Take Leonard, for example."

"Sheldon, just shut up."

"When it was the fourth of July, he decided to be a little bit more adventurous and eat sushi for the first time. Although I would never place any form of raw meat close to my mouth, I congratulate him for facing a challenge, even though it opened my eyes to his stupidity in such matters."

"Why so vague, Penny?" asked Raj, ignoring Sheldon. "We'd like to know all the details. And how the hell did Howard get a video of this and where is it at now?"

"I don't know that, either." answered Penny, and they all turned to look expectedly at him.

Howard gave a nervous laugh, pulling at his shirt collar uncomfortably. "Well, you know how everyone went home to go to sleep? I decided to stay at the party and... I saw you talking with some girl and I thought you two might start making out."

"Get on with it." urged Raj, which was proven unappreciated when Penny momentarily shifted her glare over to him.

Howard took a deep breath and continued. "Well, they did start making out, and then they went upstairs. I followed them up and saw that they went in the bedroom. Naturally I looked through the crack in the door. And they were, you know..."

"How the hell did you get a video, then?" asked Penny, practically yelling. She had never felt so violated in her life.

"Well, I didn't." Howard admitted, tensing up and holding his hands over his face. "That part was a lie. I just had to find a way to get you to do your dare. Mind you, I never actually thought that you would follow through..."

Penny stood up and stomped over to where he was sitting. "You are such an _ass_!" she seethed, repeatedly hitting him with each syllable she spoke.

"Now, now. Physical violence certainly won't resolve any of the issues in this situation. Even if he does deserve it." Sheldon told her, which made Leonard suddenly look over at him.

"So did you two really sleep together, or are you just a really good liar, Sheldon?" he asked, narrowing his eyes in defeat.

"Everything we have informed you of is, in fact, the truth." he answered, and Penny finally moved away from Howard to sit back down on the couch, looking just warmed up in releasing her anger. "But I would prefer not to share the details, a decision I would assume Penny to agree on."

Penny nodded. "None of you will ever bring any of this up again, understand?" she asked them all, and sounds of mutual agreement were heard.

Things went quiet after that.

For a moment everyone sat in silence, but Raj soon excused himself to go home and Howard jumped at the chance to follow. Leonard claimed a migraine a while after and decided to turn in early.

Sheldon moved to sit down in his spot, and Penny shifted onto the place next to him. "I never returned these." she told him, placing his underwear labeled "Friday" onto his lap.

He neatly folded it and placed it to the side of him. "Much appreciated. I shall need them again in a little less than a week."

"Sheldon..." Penny began, but found herself at a loss for words on what to say. "Thanks, again. I knew you wouldn't have done that for many people." She would have to settle on that.

"Well, that's an assumption based on my sexual habits." he pointed out. "I suppose if someone offered me a large amount of money, or perhaps to meet someone as prestige as Bill Gates, I would certainly consider it."

Penny laughed, lightly leaning against him as she did so. "Oh, Sheldon, you really are one of a kind."

"Genetically and intellectually, there's no doubt about that." he agreed. "And now that you've brought up that complicated and rather unique situation, I would like to propose to you another of the sort."

She looked over at him curiously. "And what would that be?"

"I've been thinking about it, and I've decided that it couldn't possibly hurt for us to repeat the events of last night." he told her simply. "But this time doing it in a more approachable manner by planning it out."

"What?" Penny asked, leaning back to stare at his face. She was actually surprised at his suggestion, but couldn't find herself objecting it.

Sheldon smiled over at her.

"Bazinga."

The End


End file.
